Edgeworth: Transcending history. A tale of Souls and Swords
Larry: And boobies!
Edgeworth: *sigh* Must you ruin every moment?
Larry: But there are-
Edgeworth: Shut up!
Phoenix: Can we for once skip all this stuff and get right into the review?
Larry: But then theres no comedy Nick.
Phoenix: Its a video game review, not stand up night at a bar Larry.
Edgeworth: So why dont you inform us all on what game it is Wright?
Phoenix: Soul Calibur 4 for the Xbox 360 and Playstation 3.
Larry: No Wii release?
Phoenix: This game wouldnt work on the Wii.
but what if I wanted to play Soul Calibur and my Xbox wasnt plugged in?
Phoenix: You could try actually plugging you Xbox in
Edgeworth: Or you could try Soul Calibur Legends for the Wii.
Larry: Oh God no!
Edgeworth: Okay then, I see no reason to complain.
Phoenix: Anyway, oddly enough this is the 5th game in the series.
Larry: What? Was there a Soul Calibur 0?
Phoenix: Not quite. The first game in the series was called Soul Edge, which was released in arcades, and then ported to the Playstation under the title Soul Blade. Soul Calibur was a sequel to that game, and so on.
Larry: Then why were the sequels after that numbered?
Edgeworth: That doesnt matter right now! If you want answers then go and look them up when this review is over!
Phoenix: Well its worth noting that were not big fans of the Soul series.
Edgeworth: SOME of us arent fans of video games in general.
Phoenix: Well the ones of us who arent as civilised have only really played Soul Calibur 2 on the Playstation 2, Gamecube and Xbox.
Larry: Nick! You never played Soul Calibur 3?
Phoenix: I think Maya rented it once
it was okay I guess.
Edgeworth: The fact of the matter is: Like all of our reviews were not going to compare it to the games that came before it. Were just going to review it as a game on its own.
Phoenix: Okay, now that thats out of the way lets-
Larry: I just realized that this is our first review of a game that isnt on a Nintendo consol!
Edgeworth: Ignore him Wright. Hes just wasting time.
Phoenix: Lets get on with this review. Lets start with the story, or lack thereof.
Edgeworth: Indeed, there is very little to the plot this time around.
Larry: But its a fighting game. It doesnt need a story, it just needs a lot of: HI-YA! WA-CHA! TEY-YA! *swings an invisible sword around*
Phoenix: Over the top demonstration aside, Larrys right. With fighting games people arent looking for a deep story, theyre just looking to beat each other up.
Edgeworth: Well thats true I suppose. Anyway, this game does have somewhat of a plot: All the characters are fighting for one of two swords, either Soul Calibur or Soul Edge, or both. They either want to use them to take over the world, save the world, destroy the blades, etc. There are a couple of characters who are after something different, but thats what the majority want.
Phoenix: Now, the game does have a story for each character in Story Mode but theyre not very in depth.
Edgeworth: Unless you count the back story it gives you on whats happened to them since Soul Calibur 3.
Larry: Yeah, but I dont want to have to read through a wall of text when Im playing a fighting game. I just wanna get in there and whoop some ass!
Phoenix: Again I wouldnt put it that way but Larrys right. Most people playing the game dont want to have to read that much into it.
Edgeworth: Well its not as bad as the Weapon Master mode in Soul Calibur 2, which was more or less a novel
Phoenix: Yes, but we said we wouldnt be comparing them.
Edgeworth: I think a little comparison is necessary, Wright.
you might have a point.
Larry: Theres not a lot more we can say on this section is there guys?
Phoenix: I dont think so.
Edgeworth: Some of the characters have pretty interesting back stories, but its pretty much the same story for everyone.
Phoenix: Id say we give a 4 here.
Larry: What?! Come on Nick, give it SOME credit!
Phoenix: What would you rate it?
Phoenix: That doesnt really add much
Larry: Okay, 4.5 then!
Edgeworth: I suppose I could settle for that.
Phoenix: Now gameplay, the most important aspect.
Larry: Its freaking sweet! You run around smashing people to bits with your weapon of choice!
Edgeworth: The gameplay is
what youd expect from a Soul Calibur game.
Larry: Whats that meant to mean?! Its awesome!
Edgeworth: Im not saying its not fun, Im merely saying its pretty much the same formula as the previous games.
Phoenix: But thats not a bad thing. You cant really alter too much when it comes to fighting game sequels.
Edgeworth: I didnt say it was a bad thing!
Phoenix: Its the standard slash you opponent until they fall formula, but there are some new features this time around.
Larry: You can strip the ladies this time around!
Edgeworth: What hes trying to say is that you can break your opponents armour if you hit them hard enough this time around. There are three separate sections, the head, body and legs, each will break depending on where you hit and how many times you hit it.
Phoenix: Another new feature thats worth mention is the Critical Finish.
Larry: Oh, thats freakin sweet!
Phoenix: Basically a Critical Finish is a super move a character can perform that can finish their opponent off in one move.
Edgeworth: So its like the Final Smash in Super Smash Brothers Brawl?
Phoenix: Not quite. Once this move has been initiated theres no way to stop or avoid it, and its guaranteed to finish off your opponent. With some Final Smashes you can avoid them or they might not deal a finishing blow.
Larry: Thats right! Once I hit that left shoulder button its all over!
Phoenix: Its not as simple as that, in fact its actually quite tricky to use it. You have to wait till your opponents Soul Gauge turns red, then you have to attack them while theyre guarding until you break through their guard, then press the left shoulder button. At least thats whats worked for me, I dont know if theres any other way.
Larry: It is pretty awesome, but its kinda cheap in a way. No matter how high your opponents health is, it will finish them off. It can be really annoying in a 2 player match.
Edgeworth: Have you by any chance been beaten like that in an online match Larry?
a few times
Phoenix: We would mention the Soul Gauge but in all honest I just dont get it.
Edgeworth: Neither do I.
Larry: Me either.
Phoenix: As for gameplay modes, in single player you have Story mode, The Tower of Lost Souls mode, Arcade mode, and Training mode.
Edgeworth: In Story mode you must fight through five stages.
Larry: Yeah, only five! That sucks!
Edgeworth: Whats worse is that the both the third and final stages are the same for all characters. In the third stage you fight one of the bonus characters-
Larry: You mean clone characters!
Edgeworth: If you want. On the final stage youll either fight Siegfried, Nightmare or Algol depending on the character youre playing as.
Phoenix: This mode is kind of interesting, but if you look at it in the long run its just Arcade mode with some cutscenes and tag battles in certain stages.
Larry: We should have probably mentioned tag mode before.
Phoenix: Oh right. Well tag mode is pretty self-explanatory. You can basically play as 1 to 3 characters at a time and tag in them in or out with the right shoulder button. With this you can perform even bigger combos then you can with 1 character.
Edgeworth: However this function is only available on The Tower of Lost Souls mode, and at certain parts with certain characters in Story mode.
Larry: Thats gay
Phoenix: As for Arcade mode, its the same as in Soul Calibur 2, except you fight Algol at the end with everyone and theres no Destined Battles.
Edgeworth: Though I think Story mode makes up for that.
Phoenix: But thats not to say its not a lot of fun.
Larry: What about The Tower of Lost Souls mode?
Phoenix: Well apart from having one of the most cliché names ever, in The Tower of Lost Souls you can choose to either Ascend, or Descend. In Ascend modes you go up a series of floors fighting battles against many opponents and fighting certain bosses when you come to certain floors.
Edgeworth: In this mode you can earn items if you meet certain conditions.
Larry: Yeah, but they really difficult to meet and it doesnt really tell you how.
Phoenix: Also in this mode you might have to K.O. your opponent a specific way in order to move on.
Edgeworth: On most floors you can use 2 and sometimes 3 characters at a time, this comes in handy because your health doesnt restore between each floor.
Phoenix: In Desend mode you can pick 2 characters and you basically have to fight waves of enemies while going down floors.
Edgeworth: I found this mode to be tricky at times, but its still a lot of fun.
Phoenix: Yeah, its just too bad tag team isnt available in multiplayer mode.
Edgeworth: There isnt much to say on that mode. You can either have a Standard Match where you and another player just fight each other, or you can have a Special Match where you get special status depending on your weapons and armour.
Phoenix: Its a lot of fun playing with a friend. Maya and I had a good laugh smashing each other to pieces.
Edgeworth: I suppose you two would enjoy that sort of thing.
I havent said anything in a while
this game includes an Online mode.
Edgeworth: For those who dont have any friends to play the game with
Larry: Why are you looking at me Edgey?!
Phoenix: Unfortunately I havent been able to set up Xbox Live yet, so I cant comment on lag issues or anything like that, but I think it was a good move including it.
Edgeworth: I dont even own an Xbox 360 or a Playstation 3, I had to play the game at Wrights office.
Larry: But what were you REALLY doing there Edgey?
Edgeworth: Dont encourage the yaoi fangirls Larry!
Phoenix: *sigh* The final mode worth mentioning is the Character Creator mode.
Larry: Oh yeah! Thats awesome! You can create your own character!
Phoenix: You can also give the characters youve unlocked different armour, weapons, hair styles, etc.
Edgeworth: More equipment becomes available when you get honours for doing things.
Phoenix: This mode is a lot of fun, but Id say its a bit TOO detailed, especially for somebody who isnt that creative (like me
). But Maya had a lot of fun making her and I one it, and she even managed to make the Steal Samurai.
Larry: I made myself too. I also took all the armour and clothing off the ladies.
Edgeworth: You would
Edgeworth: That wasnt a compliment!
Phoenix: Youre a sick man Larry
Edgeworth: Oh come off it Wright! I saw you did the exact same thing on your copy of the game!
no I didnt
Edgeworth: Dont even think of telling me it was Maya.
d-downloaded them from Larry via Xbox Live
Edgeworth: OBJECTION! You just said you havent been able to set up Xbox Live, Wright!
Phoenix: ACH! Wait
arent I suppose to be the one pointing out contradictions?
Larry: Okay guys I think weve talked enough about gameplay now. Final score? For me it would be a 9.
Phoenix: Only a 9?
Larry: Well its pretty awesome, but I would have liked to have seen the tag feature on multiplayer mode.
Phoenix: Fair enough.
Edgeworth: Id knock off another point for story mode being too short.
Phoenix: So an 8 then? Do we all agree?
Larry: I guess
Phoenix: Okay, graphics. The graphics are really good; especially in the cut-scenes in Story mode (too bad most of them are stock footage).
Edgeworth: Theyre pretty good
Larry: Pretty good? The amazing!
Edgeworth: Theyre not the best Ive seen on this consol, but theyre not bad in any way. But some of the backgrounds on the stages looks very
Phoenix: But to be fair thats only in very few of the stages.
Phoenix: I also felt that the Soul Calibur characters kind or stood out in the Star Wars stages, and vice-versa.
Larry: I was wondering when we were going to get to that.
Phoenix: The Star Wars characters and stages?
Phoenix: I guess nows as good a time as ever to mention them I guess.
Larry: For this game theyve got Star Wars characters as the guest characters. Yodas on the 360 and Darth Vaders on the PS3, though now both of them have become downloadable content on the others version
kinda taking the fun out of having two versions
Phoenix: And Darth Vaders secret apprentice from the game Star Wars: The Force Unleashed is on both versions.
Larry: Yeah, I always wondered Why did they put him in?
Phoenix: It was to promote the game before it came out.
Edgeworth: What I dont understand is why they put Yoda in. Why not Luke Skywalker?
Phoenix: I suppose they though it would be cooler to put Yoda in.
Larry: That little bastards as cheap as anything! You cant vertically slash him-
Edgeworth: You mean horizontally slash him Larry.
Larry: Tomato tomarto Edgey!
Edgewoth: No, they mean two different things.
Larry: Anyway you cant grab him either!
Phoenix: Anyway, now that Larrys done ranting about Yoda can we get back to talking about the graphics?
Edgeworth: Over-all Id give the graphics an 8.
Phoenix: Fine, now music.
Larry: You didnt ask my opinion on the graphics Nick!
Edgeworth: Lets be honest, nobody really cares for it Larry.
my fangirls do
Phoenix: *ahem* The music in this game is pretty good. It suits the game quite well.
Larry: Yeah, but its not really my taste in music though.
Phoenix: Mine either.
Edgeworth: Really? This is one of the few video game soundtracks that I actually enjoy.
Larry: Wow. Edgeys found a video game soundtrack he likes? Now I KNOW the apocalypse is coming.
Edgeworth: Shut up Larry!
Phoenix: Well for this section Ill give it a 9. Its good, it suits the game, but like we said its just not our taste in music.
Larry: I agree.
Edgeworth: Well I would have given it a 10 myself, but I suppose I could settle for a 9.
Phoenix: Now voice acting.
Edgeworth: This was really good. The voices suit the characters quite well and they all did a great job with all the grunts, groans and screaming.
Larry: There is the option to change their voices to Japanese for those lousy English language hating weeaboo communists.
or those just curious as to what the Japanese cast sounded like
Larry: Them too.
Edgeworth: Go on then.
Phoenix: Okay then, Larry you sum it up.
Larry: Alrighty then.
- Story: 4.5
Pro: Pretty interesting back-stories.
Con: Pretty much the same story with everyone..
- Gameplay: 8
Pro: Kept a lot like the games that came before it with some great new modes.
Con: Tag mode should be available in multiplayer mode. Story modes too short. Yoda is freaking cheap!
- Graphics: 8
Pro: Looks amazing, also: HUGE BOOBIES!
Con: Star Wars characters stand out, but to be fair that does add to the comedic value. Some backgrounds look plain.
- Music: 9
Pro: Suits the game.
Con: Not our taste in music though.
- Voice acting: 10
Pro: Voices suit the characters.
- Overall score: 8
If you have a 360 or PS3 you HAVE to have this game! If youre a Soul Calibur fan you HAVE to have this game! Some say its not as great as Soul Calibur 2, but we strongly disagree.
Phoenix: Yeah, personally we think this ones the best, but thats just our opinion.
Larry: Now if you two will excuse me, Ivy calls.
better be heading off too
Edgeworth: Just admit youre leaving for the same reason he is Wright
Phoenix: Now Ill show you! *points finger* OBJECTION!
*A huge OBJECTION speech bubble comes out, killing Edgeworth instantly*